Samuel Autman, Writers' Retreat Fellow

Samuel Autman, Writers' Retreat Fellow



thank you I pleased to announce the next reader I'd like to introduce Samuel Ogden a class of 2010 writers readers retreat hello [Applause] [Laughter] I was heard on the floor between to fuse my hands covering my face surrounded by shocked parishioners I screamed inside the governor yell of someone losing a limb to an acts of saw a gut-busting sweet report from my innermost being it was the wickedest sound that ever moved through my vocal cords and there's something in me but not from me was crying through me sorrow and embarrassment became afraid of tears and mucus on my chin I sure stick to my aid patting my shoulders brother even be alright I had collapsed near the front of Ed Memorial Chapel in Wheaton Illinois as LeeAnn pain was leading the congregation in a group prayer she was a frail woman standing behind a wooden back burner with big glasses dimpled grand gray hair pulled back in a bun she looked like a character an oatmeal caster a big fancy Rock the microphone transformed her warm soft voice and to a thunderous hit not a chance the congregation repeated words back in unison declarations from both declarations of Liberty from Old Testament deities I renounce you bail IRA now she after all I renounce you in the name of Jesus I renounce a cinema star today I renounce the idol God my father served all over the congregation people crumbled tissue into wives cheeks were flushed not flow as the attendees King high pitch please to the most high paying student as his proxy amid the screams of the world in cattle court singing melodic singing bodies fell to the floor throughout the congregation and maybe put you in remembrance of your baptism and the audience she accompanied troops of Usher's through white sheets for the convulsing twitching frames they told us the holy water was a touch point for the spirit hence the manifestations which she explained demonstrate the presence and power of God the outbursts were our inner wickedness being exposed her prayers had loosened our bonds with the wicked one she said she had invisible nails in her hands to crucify our inner selves so the uninitiated it would look like pandemonium a room littered with bodies of insane bankers created a symphony of misery I had arrived on the campus of Wheaton College Sunday afternoon Liam Payne was the keynote speaker at a week-long pastoral Chairman's news conference she would be drawing material from her books manifestos on overcoming homosexual neurosis and gender identity crisis restoring the Christian soul crisis and masculinity and the broken image restoring healing restoring wholeness through healing prayer many of her books and teachings are still used in Ex ministry and state ministries to heal homosexual today I had spent months in heaven masculinity femininity true masculinity wasn't buff men in uniform dykes on bikes but rather perhaps men to execute an idea from start the completion femininity was the ability to communicate effectively in relationships [Laughter] her teachings are steeped in centuries of evangelical and Anglican thought and blended the symbols of the liturgy blended brand of teaching singing and praying and the healing sexual with a background in literature art and as a professor at Whitney's Graduate School of Theology pain carried herself for America holy nobility she herself said she had never been a lesbian McClain's you can pray or counsel hundreds and hundreds that gave many lesbian into opposite sex Mary Baker producing citizens the writings of CS Lewis she maintained that God can sub came to live inside people and change their nature engaged rape the topic captivated me in those days I was there to see if these things were true one of my lifelong hobbies have in my youth have been discovering and obsessing over Pentecostal feature trying to absorb the words books that take four months at a time I had grown up Baptists after my friend got his church of my upbringing to the morning sizable in a Coptic Church I had in mind you shot my hands up clap dancing expression of joy and as the long life seeker was still in those days praying singing memorizing 14 scriptures 35 [Applause]

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